MY APOLOGIES TO AL PACINO AND ALL WHO LOOK LIKE ME

This post contains a puzzle. Can you tell who of the above is Al Pacino and who is me?

Here’s a clue: one of us has more hair and has a book to sell . . .

There is no prize for guessing right. I am a penurious novelist writing at a time when people no longer read the sort of novels Jane Austen praised for displaying ‘the greatest powers of the mind . . .the most thorough knowledge of human nature. . . the liveliest effusions of wit and humour . . . in the best-chosen language.’ Or at least people no longer read them in the numbers required to enable a novelist like me to afford a haircut.

So I can’t afford to give a prize either. But I bet Al Pacino can. Try him. Failing that, you could always subscribe to me….